You can’t turn around without hearing words like hygge, lykke, and lagom—living slow and balancing life has become as popular as productivity and multitasking once were.
It’s easy to see why. We’ve all spent so long transforming ourselves into productive animals that we’ve lost the ability to turn it off.
Not long ago, I was having a massage. As I lay there, doing something I love almost as much as reading, I found my mind racing. I was thinking about things I needed to do, how much to tip, is self-care selfish… On and on I went, interspersed with moments of reprimanding myself to enjoy!
I noticed a similar problem when I started observing the Sabbath and not working. The idea of a day without work, without a plan, should have relaxed me. I should have enjoyed it. But the thought of slowing down and reflecting for the day created such anxiety that I often had a migraine.
Crazy, right?
Why is living slow so hard?
After years of conditioning, it’s hard to change course. If you’ve been on the treadmill of work, motherhood, travel, or any other endeavor that’s kept you physically and/or mentally going, it’s hard to turn it off.
When I left my job to stay home with my kids, I was afraid that I’d be bored or idle. (Can you believe that?!) I couldn’t imagine having those 45-50 hours a week open to whatever. As it turned out, my time-filling went into hyper-drive and I quickly had plenty on my plate.
With those extra responsibilities came the need to be more productive. With the productivity, came more speed and quantity, and less quality. Goodbye, slow living. Hello, busy life.
Why busy is bad
Busy is a badge of honor in our culture. When people ask how we are, we toss off busy with a smile and everyone nods in understanding. Can you imagine if someone replied, “Relaxed, just enjoying life and taking it slow,” to that query? Crickets would be heard.
Despite its almost lauded status, busy really is bad. Studies show that multitaskers do not do things better than unitaskers—they just give less attention to both tasks. This can also lead to feelings of stress and anxiety, feeling frazzled and never satisfied with what’s done. There’s no such thing as a job well done because no job is ever done.
The reasons that Scandinavian principles like hygge and lagom captured the imagination and hopes of people everywhere is because these come from countries who rank especially high on the happiness index. We are all starting to realize that the life we’ve created isn’t the life we really wanted, and we want to make a change.
But how?
The Benefits of Living Slow
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You can read a number of books or blog posts on these subjects (I’ve got The Little Book of Hygge, The Little Book of Lykke, and Chasing Slow on my bookshelf). But instead of describing these ideas, let’s talk about what they can do for you.
Try to think of a time when you slowed down, whether intentionally or because you had no choice. If you’re like me, you’ve probably had more experience with the latter.
I’ll go first…
As a nursing mom, I often found myself pinned to a chair and at the mercy of my baby and anyone who could be my legs and bring supplies. Sometimes, I found myself on the short end of this situation, with a hungry child and no one to help, particularly in the middle of the night.
Too tired to read, too awake to sleep. Sometimes without a phone to play an inane game on or check my to-do list. I’d just sit there. I’d listen to the murmurs of my baby and the night sounds out my window.
My mind would drift, but nowhere important. In that moment, all I did was what I was doing—feeding my baby. Instead of trying to wring every second out of those hours and make them productive, I did one thing and refused to feel guilt for it.
Oh, it was hard sometimes. I’d yearn for my phone, compose emails in my head, and try to cook with one hand. But I also realized that these times of slowing down were essential to my sanity.
My mind was quieter, which helped me relax. My focus was absolute, so I felt less frazzled. I had time to reflect more deeply, which opened up my thoughts and heart to things you just can’t reach in the midst of constant busyness.
Living slowly will lower your stress, calm your mind, expand your thoughts, and let you enjoy life in ways you can’t when you’re rushing through it. Your life will be more balanced, and for a woman who juggles a lot, this can be a welcome change.
Tools for slowing down
Every change needs tools. And consistency. And perseverance. Let’s face it, turning away from the way we’ve been doing it for years, if not decades, is hard. I struggle daily with living more slowly.
But tools help. So, here are a few things that will help you live slower and find more balance in your life:
- Quiet time – spend a few minutes each morning setting the mood for your day. Find a quiet place and time to do this.
- Meditation – slipping this into your day with bring your focus back to the present and off the treadmill.
- Less caffeine – I cut out caffeine because I noticed my anxiety and stress were higher and my sleep worse. Cutting down on this helped me slow down.
- Margin – it’s easier to slow down when you’re not rushing. Build margin into the day to account for the little things that come up and cause us to rush and be late, thereby adding stress.
- Blank space – don’t overplan or overcommit. More, in this case, is definitely not better.
- Read – read books and blogs that reinforce your choices and inspire you. The world around you will say faster, faster, faster, but you want voices in your ear that are saying slow down.
Books to help you live better
When you’re looking for explanations, benefits, how-tos, and motivation, why not look in a book? Check out these book recommendations on living slower and balancing life:
The Little Book of Hygge by Meik Wiking
The Little Book of Lykke by Meik Wiking
Chasing Slow: Courage to Journey Off the Beaten Path by Erin Loechner
Slow: Simple Living for a Frantic World by Brooke McAlary
Lagom: Not Too Little, Not Too Much: The Swedish Art of Living a Balanced, Happy Life by Niki Brantmark
Notes from a Blue Bike: The Art of Living Intentionally in a Chaotic World by Tsh Oxenreider
I hope that this post will help you live a little slower and enjoy life a little more. It’s not easy to change your stripes and buck the trends of society, but saying no to busy and yes to slow will lead to a healthier balance in your life, as well as renewed focus and calm in your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being.
How do you incorporate slower living into your life? What benefits have you seen? I’d love to hear in the comments!
Interested in more posts on slow living and life balance? Check out these posts:
How to Savor the Moments Amidst the Busyness of Family
Choosing One Word This Year: Depth over Breadth
My Goal This Year to Savor My Family
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