Do you have enemies? Have you ever wondered what would turn them into friends… or even wanted to?
“Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?” – Abraham Lincoln, 16th president of the United States
I’ve never really had an enemy. No playground nemesis. No back-stabbing co-worker. And no rivalries worth noting.
But I have been hurt by others. I’ve felt the anger and pain of betrayal. And even though my hurt wasn’t the goal, but rather the side-product, I know what it is to be attacked, even if indirectly.
While these people weren’t my enemies, they stood in a place where they could easily have become such. The question was, would I let them?
Harboring anger and bitterness never hurts your enemies, or the people who cause those feelings. They just fester inside us, eroding our peace and leaving behind an acid that spews out of us when someone or something gets our defenses up.
How do you turn enemies into friends?
I like this quote by Abraham Lincoln because the first part about “destroying my enemies” is like catnip to the dark part of our hearts that wants to hurt those who hurt us. But then Lincoln smacks that ugly part back down by explaining that he does this by making “them my friends.”
And he’s not talking about the frenemies that make reality TV so popular these days. He was talking about a genuine friend. So, how do you turn an enemy into a friend?
The first step is to remember that “since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another” (1 John 4:11). We need to model the love God shows for us—even when we act anything but loving toward Him—and give that same love to others… including our enemies.
We were all made in God’s image. Not one of us is better than another. So, instead of holding ourselves above the person who wronged us, or continues to do so, put yourself on their level, and maybe in their shoes. What makes them act the way they do?
With love and understanding, we can let go of the anger that enmity can cause. We can reach out in friendship. Then, the ball is in their court.
If you have lost contact with the people who have hurt you in the past, consider praying for them. This is what I do. You can’t be upset with someone while you pray that God blesses them.
So, I challenge you today to destroy your enemies—by making them your friends instead.
Have a peaceful Monday!
Looking for more encouragement and inspiration today? Try these posts:
What Does Real Friendship Look Like?
Hi Rebecca, your post certainly touches a nerve with me lol. I too have never had much in the enemy department. But, sho, I never knew how quickly family could turn into enemies. I now know where some of those great movies come from. It is a fine line we walk, trying not to lose family to enemy-status but there comes a time where one has to hand them over to God and leave them in His very capable hands. I had to do this to save my sanity and my own little family and move forward in life. If God wants to restore those relationships, it is in His hands to do so. My hands are not so gentle or merciful. 🙂
Great post
God bless
Hi Tracy! I’m glad you liked the post and I agree that we sometimes need to place people in God’s hands. He is more capable of changing hearts and opening us to forgiveness. Thanks for reading my blog and God bless!
I love your quote from Lincoln! It has never occurred to me as simply before how such a strategy would be so helpful. You relating it back to how God loves us first and how that can be the first step and prayer the second is insightful. Well done!
Isn’t that a great quote? I’m so glad you liked the post. God is great and also a great example of how we should all behave toward each other. Bless you and thanks for reading!
THANK YOU FOR THIS POST.
You’re welcome! And thank you for reading 🙂